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my life-changing books


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The last 8 years or so, I have, joyously, read a lot of books. Even better, most of those books have been good. But there are some that haven’t just been great—they’ve totally altered how I see the world. Whether because they gave me another way to look at an idea I already believed in; provided vocabulary for concepts that were already important to me; taught me something new; gave actionable ideas for things I highly value; or completely shifted my perspective.

By reading through these titles you will have a very firm grasp on my beliefs, and what matters to me. Or maybe just learn something. I will, however, be excluding parenting books for another post, as that’s a rather specific category.

It was a bit difficult to pair down to a reasonable stack of most-important reads. Some books I have are really excellent, but they didn’t necessarily ‘shake things up’ the way others in my stack did. To determine what books made it, I considered the impact it had on me when I read it, and in the long run. Was I totally blown away? Terribly excited to learn from the book? Did it present new information that altered my point-of-view? And, how often do I think about the things I took from the book?

I want to share these life-changing books with you.

In no particular order:


Nonfiction


The Little Book of Hygge

Meik Wiking

You may remember, in about 2016, the concept of hygge was trending very hard. It interested me, so I picked this up, as it seemed to be the definitive title, and I was blown away. Through my entire life, there was a certain feeling, or vibe I strived for, and loved above all else. I could describe things that could contribute to that feeling, but I had no idea there was already a word, and a whole way of being about it. Reading this book felt amazing, because I finally could express something important to me, and find more ways to create hygge. Hygge is still a very huge part of my everyday.

The Happiness Project

Gretchen Rubin

The entire premise of this book was very enticing to me. Rubin looks at actionable ways in which she might improve her life, and focuses on changing a lot of habits, or adding new ones, over a year. It was a brilliant read that made me feel excited for the things that can happen when you are passionate, determined, or at least consistent. We all know little things can make a big difference, but this book really followed all the ups and downs, providing a realistic, but still lovely, view on how we can become better, and happier.

The Story of You

Ian Morgan Cron

This was not the first enneagram (the first being The Road Back to You by the same author) title I’d read. However, this book, in particular, delves not into what the enneagram is, or what each number is, but  h o w  each number is, and how they came to be the number they are. From there, he gives practical advice on becoming the healthiest version of yourself. I am super into the enneagram, and, earlier this year, made, I think, 12 people take the test so I’d know their numbers.

Wintering

Katherine May

This book was outstanding. As someone who feels like they are both very in-tune with themselves (I ‘just use feeling’ a lot. ex: when does my kid need to nap), but also swings hard the other way into super-ambitious and busy mode, this book was fantastic. The book is largely the author telling her personal story of needing to slow down, and, like a plant in winter, sort of hibernate and care for herself, and learn to go slower, and really enjoy being alive. It’s anti-hustle culture, for sure. I think pretty much everyone could benefit from reading this book.

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up

Marie Kondo

I mean, y’all already knew this would be on this list. This was one of the first books I read that took a part of my belief system and put it in a new light, reframed it, and gave practical, hands-on advice. I have found so much truth in this book. I’ve read it multiple times, and obviously followed it’s teachings, and proselyte about it nigh constantly. I joke that I’m a religious follower, but it supports my beliefs, so it’s not really a joke, is it? Read the book. Do what she says when she says to do it, and exactly how she says to do it. It’ll change your life.

The Nordic Theory of Everything: In Search of a Better Life

Anu Partanen

When I read this book, it totally rocked my world. At the time, I had very different social and political views than I do now. However, things were starting to get crazy, and I couldn’t even take the word//opinions of those closest to me as good enough to align with. And then I read this book. The author is from Finland, but lives in the US. Basically, she just compares and contrasts her experiences of living in both places. She felt more secure in Finland, but loves the opportunities she has in America, as well. Throughout the book, she gives exceptional support for why certain parts of each are an overall better way for things to be. Really good arguments. To the point where M A N Y  times, I would have a rebuttal to something she’d said, and she would immediately have reasons for why my (literally my specific) rebuttal didn’t stand up. But she is so kind, and objective that it allowed me to consider other ideas just as ideas, and then decide what I aligned with, rather than trying to coerce, or force, or scare, or threaten me into feeling a certain way. I recommend this one so much.

The Sum of Us

Heather McGee

This was another book that totally shifted my perspective. Before picking up this little, I had read several other books about racism/being anti-racist. However, those largely had hands-on ideas, or are very personal and introspective. I knew about a lot of problems, but it wasn’t until this book that I  k n  e w  about them. McGee is an expert in her field, and her knowledge and experience really helps readers understand the history, and current situation for Black people in America. Then history we were never taught in school. Like I said, I knew things before, but this book laid everything out so plainly, it was eye-opening. If you think you now anything about this, read this book. And if you know nothing, this is a great place to start.

The Anthropocene Reviewed

John Green

It’s a beautiful book. So many memoir-type books focus on telling a story, and I  l o v e  that John (I’ve been watching him for almost half of my life, so I’m going on a first-name basis) turns that idea around, and focuses on singular experiences, and how those can be woven with other ideas (almost a free-association). There’s meaningful moments, core-memory moments, sad moments, and very light-hearted reviews. After reading his book, I finally knew how I could approach talking about some things I wanted to blog about for years, but wasn’t sure exactly how—now, there’s literally a tab for ‘a green anthropocene reviewed’ on this blog’s menu. I think this book would be good for anyone to read, because it can help you think more deeply on your own experiences and opinions, which can enrich your life.

The Little Book of Lykke

Meik Wiking

Meik Wiking got me again with this other book. I read it right before the lockdown started. Right after I had experienced a very supportive community after my son was born. And it opened my mind. I had  k n o w n  for years how important relationships with others were, but as a shy and introverted person, I wasn’t sure how to actually cultivate that in a way that felt good. This book is chock full of ideas, and examples from around the world. It helped me come up with new things to do with others, and to place more weight on social connection, outside of just my family. It was the start of me changing my belief on the purpose/meaning off life itself. And, as I’ve taken things I’ve learned from this book and utilized them, we have been extremely fortunate, and have been able to grown our ‘network’, and find new people to enjoy time with, and even new friends that have become immensely important to us.

Mother’s Milk

Rachel Hunt Steenblik

When I read this, I already had two kids. Having kids had already made me ponder on womanhood, motherhood, my own history, and who I wanted to be. Like most people, having my first baby brought hardship, but such overwhelmingly positive changes. Then, when I had my second, I had a hard time adjusting to two kids. I had already thought about Heavenly Mother, but reading this book was such a spiritual experience. It does speak of a Divine Mother, but it’s very much likened to being a mother, or being a child with their mother. I read this to my kids for our Poetry Tea Time, and they enjoyed it (though I cried a lot). I think for any woman, or anyone wanting to understand different perspectives, or ponder the motherhood of anyone they know, this is an amazing read.

Walkable City

Jeff Speck

I recently let slip some city-planning passion in one of my posts, and it’s because, when I wrote it, I was reading this book. This is one of those books that gave me vocabulary for things that I simply didn’t have before. While reading it, I realized what made so many places I vacationed to as a kids special, and why I was so hellbent on capturing that in my everyday; and exactly why we ended up putting roots down in Provo. It pointed out things in our everyday city and suburbs that are obviously not ideal, but it taught me the how and the why of things are the way they are, and it filled me with a desperate passion that can only be matched with when I read No Such Thing as Bad Weather. I know, it probably sounds like a boring, or niche subject, but it directly impacts you every single day (no matter where you live—this isn’t solely about cities), so I beg you to read it.



Fiction


Pachinko

Min Jin Lee

This was my favourite book of 2022. In the US, we rarely mention Korean History, and this book was eye-opening. The author also went though a rigorous process to get to where she felt like she could write a great story, and she wrote and outstanding one. The characters are all so well-developed. And the situations are so difficult, but many are highly nuanced, as well. I haven’t stopped feeling passionate about it. It’s a  b i g  book, and I read it in under a week, it was so amazing.

The Book of Longings

Sue Monk Kidd

I had heard this book was good, but I didn’t realize how good. Kidd is well-researched, and paints such a vivid picture. Though I shorthand-call this “Jesus Fan-fiction”, it’s extremely respectful, and not at all weird, like I worried it might be. The ending had me bawling. It lit a fire in me, and I felt lots of truth in its message. This is one I will recommend my daughter read in 5-10 year intervals forever, starting at about 15. And I plan to do that same. If you’re not religious, you can read it for the well-written story, with fantastic characters, and the difficult real-life situations it presents. I think any feminist could come away with something. But for religious folks, this is a must-read.


I hope that you consider reading some of these books—maybe even one or two of them that don’t appeal that strongly to you to see what they might be able to teach you, as they taught me.

I have almost all of these titles in their own booklist on my shop at bookshop.org! For the one that isn’t is linked on amazon––just click the titles.

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2 Comments

  1. Cory Stokes
    June 29, 2023 / 11:04 am

    What a fantastic list of books. Here’s a couple you might want to add to your reading queue: “Life is in the Transitions” by Bruce Feiler, and “Where Good Ideas Come From” by Steven Johnson. These have been very influential for me and shaped how I see the interactions and unpredictability that go with day to day life.

    • lindsay
      Author
      June 29, 2023 / 2:05 pm

      Thanks! I looked up your recommendations, and added them to my list–they look very much up my alley.

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