What a year, right? I’ll save you yet another pontification on 2020, and just get to the meat.
This past year was the first year I decided to go with a resolution w o r d. I liked the idea of tailoring your choices year-round to an idea, instead of having a list of things to check off. Last year, our word was care. Specifically, care of ourselves, and what we already had. Here’s what that ended up looking like for us:
- taking care of all aspects of our health. Todd started going to my trainer with me about a 1/3 of the way through the year. Sitting all day for his job was leaving him creaky and unbalanced, and now he’s feeling so much better. Midway through the year, I started a meal plan, and it’s helped me lose baby weight, but also just feeling so much better than I had been. We eat out less, and I’ve been cooking more. It helps that, for the first time in my life, I’ve started ’winging’ dinners. I used to be 100% recipe, but the meal planning (plus shopping, and then actually executing on what I’d planned) just wasn’t working out. I have leaned how to wing delicious white wine chicken, and chicken pies. Overall, I am just more able to throw something decent together, and that saves me a lot of effort. We’ve also started eating dinner for lunch half the time. At the end of the day, parenting can leave me very not-in-the-mood for cooking, but if I do the big meal at noon, then we get a nice meal in, and use what we have. Last year, I also had Gwendolyn on a chiropractic plan, and it’s done really well. Both Todd and I have learned a lot more about ourselves, and how to communicate even more effectively (the secret is vulnerability). Us adults both found hairdressers, and the kids both got haircuts, too.
- taking care of our budget. Making a budget isn’t new to us, but last year, we decided to really, really commit. That meant no extraneous spending for the first few months, and knowing what things our family would need (say, clothes), as well as what we wanted. Complete perfection eluded us just a couple of months, but overall, our dedication made this area of our lives less stressful. And, it meant we were both able to get some bigger things, because we planned so well for them.
- taking care of our time. To anyone who has never tried to curate any following, or interest in something they’re making, perhaps this will come as a surprise, but this stuff takes a lot of time and effort. The first year I was blogging, I was posting 3 times a week to try and set up my ~vibe~, and get a lot of content out. But to make content, you have to do things. We were woking on a house project, or going out for some experience minimum of once a week. That may not sound like a lot, but add in that I was capturing pictures of everything, too, and editing, and then writing, and it was sort of leaving our whole family exhausted. My ‘plan’ for last year was to post twice a week until Harry was a year old, but adjusting to having a second baby took so much longer to just to than I expected, and it didn’t happen. Am I sad about it? Yes. But I tried to focus on caring for us, instead of pumping out content. It took Todd most of the year to accept that, when he asked what the weekend plans were and I said ‘nothing’, that I actually meant it. I’m ambitious, and like to do things, but the emphasis on care really helped me adjust to a slower pace, and lower expectations + less planning. A global pandemic also helped us choose to stay home. As second part of taking care of our time, for me, was using my phone less. I’d found myself rather glued to it, for no real reason, and I wanted to change that. So, I have tried to replace phone time with reading as much as possible (and I’ve cut my time by half!). That has resulted in me reading 24 books in 2020, several of which were life-changing.
- taking care of our home. Though we were more focused on caring for the people in our family, we also wanted to keep fixing up our home. This last year, we finally got around to painting our basement, and moving our office down there. This had allowed us to use our entire home—instead of avoiding the bottom floor. We replaced our light switches on 2 floors; did little odds-and-ends we had needed to do; refinanced; and replaces our windows. We had to get a new vacuum, after ours died, and getting a cordless vacuum CHANGED OUR LIVES. For a good time, ask us about our vacuum.
- taking care of our lifestyle. Lastly, but definitely not leastly, we got two e-bikes (a must for living where we do). I’d wanted to get a bike since Gwendolyn was little, but especially now that I have two kiddos. I figured it could be an alternative to just walking; and would be more amenable to me than putting everyone in care seats, and loading up to drive literally everywhere. I also insisted Todd get one, so we could all bike together. And it’s been great! Todd has found an absolute passion for biking, and we’ve really loved biking to town, or just nowhere in particular. Yes, it takes more time, but what were we going to do with that time? Spend it on our phones? Biking, the journey ends up being as fun as the destination. We added a third––and final––cat to our home this year, as well. Another baby to care for! Todd and I also managed 2 dates this year (thanks to the family who watched our kids), one of which was totally kid-free. Amazing. Todd picked up a new skill, and took a tapestry class, as well as mastering his very own bread recipe, and giving loaves away to neighbors. Finally, we went on lots of outdoor adventures, taking the time to really enjoy nature. We checked off as many hikes on my ‘to hike’ list as we could, and saw so many beautiful places!
So, that’s how care has manifested for us in 2020. Since having a word to reference was so helpful last year, we’re doing it again this year. Though, it was harder for us to pinpoint the perfect one. We finally did, and it’s:
m i n d f u l n e s s
Our thought here is that we want to be present; we want to actively choose what to do with our time, and how we act. We want to be mindful, and ask ourselves ‘is this getting me closer to who I want to be?’. Less passivity; less screens; more involvement; more action; less excuses. Personally, I’m hoping to learn + improve some new skills, and help Gwendolyn out with ones she wants to learn, too. We’ll see where mindfulness takes us!
PS I love looking through my year of photos, and seeing just how many wonderful memories we made throughout the year. What are some of your 2020 highlights?
